May we all rise for love

I wrote this in honor of One Billion Rising on February 14th...wasn't able to post it here at that time so posting now!

As women rise all over the world today, as men rise to stop the violence, to stop the hatred of women, of other. I send them love. I send us all love. 
May we rise and rise and remember. 
We are one
May we come home to the beauty of our hearts
violence begets violence
Love begets love. 
May we all rise
May this love I feel be sent throughout the world today and may those who need it receive it. 
May they remember they are not alone, that the divine is bringing them love in so many ways, May they open their hearts to something beyond chocolate, teddy bears, overpriced dinners and the cultural imposed shoulds of this day, in order to truly RECEIVE LOVE. To be LOVE.
The exact love they need that is here for them in this moment.
May we drop our armor, our shields.
May our hearts be open towards ourselves and one another. 
May nature unite us, may we unite for nature and bless it and honor it. 
May we remember we are one. 
May we honor the earth, mother earth who offers us love and nourishment in every moment. 
May we rise for her. 
May we rise so that we are all free to live wild hearted lives
For we are meant to be free. 
We are meant to be wild
We are meant to love and touch and commune in sacred ways
May we reclaim our birthright
Our truth
We are one
May we rise for love

Get out there and dance!

Yesterday I curled up on a chair with a view of the lake and watched the Mexican movie Gloria. It's been on my iTunes for a long time...but yesterday as I digested all that's happened these last few weeks, as I struggled with where I still bump up against being vulnerable, sharing my heart, with those words getting caught in my throat, with where my wild heart is still domesticated...As I digested so much goodness, so much love. As I realize I have so much more love to give and receive, I was guided to watch Gloria. I savored the ending of this movie (which is so worth watching, I included it below) if even for a little dance break.

I needed this reminder, that these past few years I have done the work and it's my time to be on the dance floor, to open my arms to the world and let the love flow. To dance my dance. To sing my song. To trust my heart. That my presence is my gift. To be tender, to be gentle, to climb mountaintops, to sleep under the stars, to dance salsa, to ask for hugs, to sit in the morning dawn of Patagonia. To savor each moment. To welcome in all these different tones of love.

These are different lyrics than the Laura Brannigan version I grew up with and seem so much more in line with what I needed to hear. The song is sung by Umberto Tozzi, which I love considering I've been surrounded by Spanish and Italian these last few weeks. 

Here's to the glory of letting our beautiful wild hearts guide us, so we can all give and receive more love. And have those tender and wild places that we all have within us met with great care. Here's to getting out on the dance floor and doing our dance.

Gloria,
You’re missing in the air
Your presence is missing
Warm innocence
You’re missing in my mouth that without wanting to names you
And I will write my story with the word

Gloria
Because here next to you the morning lights up
the truth and the lie are called Gloria

Gloria,
You’re missing in the air
You’re missing in the sky,
Burn me in your fire
Melt the snow
That freezes my chest
I await you Gloria.
Gloria,
Field of smiles
Water in the desert,
Open heart
Adventure of my mind,
My table, and my bed
Of the garden of my present
I await you Gloria

Gloria,
For whom the day waits
And while everyone sleeps,
With the memory invents
Aroma amongst the trees
In a magical land
For whom fog breathes
For whom rage breathes

You melting in her kisses
You disrobe provocatively
And I make shadows on the ceiling
Thinking of Gloria

Gloria,
You’re missing in the air
You’re missing in the sky,
Burn me in your fire
Melt the snow
That freezes my chest
I await you Gloria.

Gloria, Gloria, smiles (Gloria)
Water in the desert
(Gloria) open heart (Gloria)
Adventure of my mind my table
And my bed in my garden this you hope Glory

Gloria, (Gloria)
Field of smiles (Gloria)
Water in the desert, (Gloria)
Open heart (Gloria)
Adventure of my mind,
My table, and my bed
Of the garden of my present
I await you Gloria.


Alchemy: owning our magical power to transform and create our lives

Alchemy: noun. a seemingly magical process of transformation, creation, or combination.

I wouldn't say this entire process of transformation and creation has FELT magical and yet looking back, magic has infused and found its way into my life. It crept up on me. Helping heal my heart, mind, body and soul. Bringing me back to my power and understanding that I'm an alchemist. That in any moment I can take something and transform it. And here is the thing. We are all alchemists. Many of us weren't raised knowing it. That we could shine the light on sadness and transform it into great compassion or speaking our truth. That anger is fuel for passion, or justice, or new laws. That we can take rejection, hatred and judgment and alchemize it into clear boundaries and unconditional love. 

When I started connecting to my alchemical ways, there was one shift I found to be the hardest. Well, two shifts. One was that when I was feeling listless, depressed, mired down in the darkness was believing/knowing I could change this. I thought I was stuck in this energy. I spent months on my couch in this energy, watching sad things, listening to sad songs, talking about it and talking about it and talking about it also kept my mind in this low vibe state.  What I've been learning is that I can alchemize it. Honor I'm feeling low vibe. Know that it's just energy. Be curious about it. Take a long shower. Step outside and smell and feel fresh air. Make art. Throw an egg against a wall. Scream in the car. Take a walk in nature. Watch New Girl or bloopers on youtube and laugh. Change my thoughts from 'oh my god I'm going to spend the entire day inside in darkness feeling exhausted." to "I'll go outside, I'll listen for birds, I'll enjoy the sun on my face. I'll phone a friend." I'll give myself some time to go way deep into it and then I will go outside and eat lunch. I learned I had to change/shift the energy I was stuck in. That I could change and shift it. 

This saved my life. 

The other shift that I have epically resisted?  Getting into my body. Our bodies are made of matter. All of life is energy. Emotions, a table, a bird, a blade of grass, lentils, me. We are all composed of matter, of energy. So when my matter is dense and heavy and weighed down with low vibration energy, I commit to listening and moving to 3 songs. 3 songs to dance, shake, stretch, rage, get on the floor and move as slow as a snail, move around the room like a flamenco dancer. 3 songs to change my vibration.  Sometimes I spend 5 minutes stretching my right hip and feel that energy move through my body. I listen to music with different vibrations to move my cells and create a different resonance. Today I spent an hour listening to playful songs and then going into a much slower rhythm to s-l-o-w-l-y stretch my body. I let my body be my guide.

But I commit to 3 songs because I've noticed my mind wants to keep me safe which means being anywhere but my powerful body. "Hey, let's start our taxes." "Was that a text? You should go check the phone." "Did you get the mail yesterday?"  We are hardwired for resistance. New actions create change. So in committing to 3 songs, I am creating the pattern and habit of alchemy.

When I'm done I wash my hands, or take a shower and get that energy off of me. I go barefoot on the grass and connect to earth, give it this old energy and take in the clean high vibe energy of mother earth.  

I've mentioned a few things for you to research. Notice the lower vibrations. The heaviness. Alchemize It. Own your power with your intention, with your body, your mind and using the gift of mother nature, music, thoughts and choice and see what happens.

We have more power then we know.

To set boundaries, to say no, to change the tv channel from fear inducing news to laughter.  We have choice to see the best in people as we walk in a mall, or a parking lot or our workplace.  So keep noticing the heavy, keep moving through it. It's part of life but it doesn't have to own us. This is where the magic is.

We are all alchemists. 

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If you are looking for alchemy music- follow me on Spotify!

Pushing my steamer trunk off the pier and opening my medicine bag...

The other day I received this note on Facebook from a childhood friend.

"I just want to let you know that many of my happy childhood memories are with you up at your house. You are an amazing spirit and touched people even when you didn't think you did! You are a special soul! Love you Kim."

When did I lose this connection?  This sense of specialness in simply being me?  Knowing that my love was enough? That I was enough? When did you?

I look back on my life and am so saddened by how much self-hatred and self-doubt I carried with me as the heaviest of luggage for so long...imagine Rose's luggage from 'Titanic.' Hauling around trunk after trunk and there weren't 20-carat sapphire necklaces or resplendent dresses inside.  There was a lot of coal, black tar.

Because I didn't think me loving and being love was enough, was anything special.  My wires got crossed about what being 'a special soul' looked like.  It meant I had to be thinner, sexier, more powerful, be the Executive Director, the CEO, the interior designer, the rock climber.  I had to achieve and keep moving forward. 

Why did I come to believe I was wrong? Not enough? That I had to be this/be that to be loved?  To be seen?  By my family, by men, by work, by the stranger on the plane?

I was wrestling with this false version of self trying to attain and be it, rather than simply dropping that trunk of coal and opening up and delving into the richness of my own medicine bag which is full of so many luscious, magical treats.  There are wands, playlists, creative ideas galore, green drink recipes, tarot cards, one way tickets, a yoga mat, my tent for camping and my amazing dreamtime thermarest, heels for nights out, hugs, slow hip circles, trauma healing techniques, Salazon Dark Chocolate with Sea Salt, flip flops, my mermaid tail, flower oils, a loud laugh, an out of pitch singing voice, silliness, irreverence, and love. So much love.  

I look back and I was and am this bright spirit of love.  I have always done love capers and I lost all of that, well I lost the value of it. 'How are you going to monetize it? What is the value of this in the world?'  And letting others determine the value for me, rather believing the value they placed on it as truth.  The most magical, mystical, loving parts of me got shoved aside (by me) trying to fit into these cultural, patriarchal and feminist visions of me that I was told, "be this and you'll get success, love, safety and acceptance."  (My driving need for acceptance and approval is a blog post/400 page tome unto itself). So, I accepted this vision out of a primal fear of not fitting in, being poor, and unloved. And that's such, well, bullshit.

I am so light, I am love. I have always been good, kind, generous, and loving. And that matters. It counts for more than I know. Now, it didn't always come from the healthiest of places (I'll drive you to the airport at 3am even know I barely know you fellow Hallett Hall dorm person...please love me!)  But it came from a very real place within me.  A place that knows radical love transforms everything, connects everyone.  Telling someone when you like their shirt, their partner, their dog, their homemade cookies - and you mean it- that's love.  Listening to someone. Making someone their favorite ice cream cake.  Holding someone when they cry. Where would our world be without these moments? Without homemade cards and lemonade stands.  Without surprise parties and romantic gestures.  Without neighbor helping neighbor.  This is love. This is what we remember. This is what sustains us, what calls us.

So share your love wide, own it, bathe in it, reach into your well and bring all that love up to share, it's not like there's a scarcity.  I want to pass knowing I have rung out every ounce of love and joy that was mine to share. That every gift in my medicine bag is used with total delight and love. 

What steamer trunk can you delightfully shove off the end of the pier and watch sink away?What do you see when you peer into your medicine bag?  Tell me, I'd love to know!  Take it out and enjoy. The world is waiting, needing for you to own and share your gifts and your love. 

Yours in lightened voyages and magical days, 

Kim

Enjoying the light...and chocolate

Enjoying the light...and chocolate




What is Wild? Part 2

"TO BE FULLY HUMAN IS TO BE WILD. Wild is the strange pull and whispering wisdom. It’s the gentle nudge and the forceful ache. It is your truth, passed down from the ancients, and the very stream of life in your blood. Wild is the soul where passion and creativity reside, and the quickening of your heart. Wild is what is real, and wild is your home. I urge you to unravel the listless, rigid parts and feed your wild, because it is the wild you, not the barely alive, embedded-into-routine, zombie-like you that is now struggling for air. For turn on. For sweet prana. Restore the wild and the warrior."                     

                                                                                                      Victoria Erickson

It's Friday- bust out of routine, shoulds and schedule and feed your wild. 

Let's dance and celebrate how your wrong make's you so right with Pink.