Sending love, Kim style.

Written on February 23rd. 

Arrived. Santiago, Chile. And after a week of bread, oat cakes, yogurt, potatoes, recovering from food poisoning I am happy to have looked at a menu and not silently thrown up in my mouth at the thought of meat or fish. For years I had dreamed of watching and dancing tango in Buenos Aires, of watching a football game in Argentina, of wandering around this city of great history and architecture and soaking it in. Of finding a romantic courtyard and sipping a glass of wine in the mid day heat....and none of that happened. 

So I trust I will return in diving timing to experience these long held dreams. i was guided to go to Iguazu Falls and then on to Santiago, Chile and I don't mess with guidance (I do my best not to). So here I am. Sipping some wine, in an outdoor courtyard and I just ate my first dinner in a week. So far, so good. So here is to letting go of expectations. To surrender, to flow. Here's to more play. After days of being sick, after the energy of Iguazu Falls and the full moon, after all the emotions of leaving Argentina, I am spent. I wrote L a postcard today care of the place he works, the lodge we met at. Addressing it to all there and using words that will only deeply resonate with him. That are only for him to truly appreciate. Since he is offline until April, I wanted to reach out to him with love as I left Argentina and it was so much fun to write this postcard in code for us.

I kissed the postcard before I put it in the mailbox at the airport, then cried my way through security and passport control, and then into a bathroom stall to let the love I felt here, not just from L, but from this land, its people, move through me. That's what these tears are, me feeling loved. Me feeling held. There is joy, there is gratitude, there is grief for going without this for so long. For some how believing I wasn't worth loving. For keeping men out of my life to protect myself, for the lost years and gratitude that I am here now. 

I am curious what brings me to Chile. I am open, I am ready. More please universe. And thank you for the fish, for the wine, for this sweet little hotel with nature and a courtyard in the midst of bustling city, for safe travels, good seat mates, easy passport control, kind taxi drivers. all of it matters. love matters. 

Buenos Noches, K