Sometimes you're guided...

Sometimes you are guided to not make any plans for Thanksgiving and you have to surrender and trust even though there is part of you that deeply wants to be around a table with your man, your community and has wanted that for years. Instead you say a prayer to give and receive. To feel some magic, communion, to experience beauty, joy, wild, play, and love. To be of service. So you wake up mid-morning and make your way to the Macy's day parade and take in some of the floats, the energy of it all. The delight and the joy. Then on to Starbucks for a snack of steamed coconut milk and since this Starbucks just opened the barista can't break the $100 of the woman in front of you. And you sense her frustration so you offer to pay. And she say's no. She say's no about 5 times until you convince her to receive the gift. And as she picks up her drinks you chat for a bit and share the journey you're on. And she brings over her mother who is visiting from Russia and her baby daughter to meet you. And her mother speaks Russian and she translates to say "thank you so much and may you have many many blessings on your travels" there are hugs and goodbyes. And this feels so rich and so delicious. And you walk for awhile, never having experienced a Thanksgiving in a city that is so busy on this day. You are guided to one of your favorite places, Bryant Park which has been transformed into a winter wonderland including an ice skating rink, holiday shops, apple cider and funnel cakes with nutella. You meet people from Tibet, the UK, NYC, China, and hear so many languages around you. You go to a store called French Mermaid and meet the owner and talk about hair, mermaids and the goodness and comfort of Barefoot Dreams blankets. You visit the (red) tent and learn about the babies being born to HIV mothers, that are HIV free because of new drugs. You continue to walk, letting your body guide you. Desiring to do more love capers.

And you notice a Walgreens caddy corner and think oh i must be seeing this so I can go buy some candles. But your body says 'no take a left.' And you notice an older woman asking for directions to the eye hospital and some locals are trying to help her but all she can remember is that she used to take the train down from the Bronx and got off near a museum that was near Penn Station that was near the hospital. So you use your phone and search eye hospital and can't find the one she is needing. You ask if she has any address or anything written down. She pulls out an empty box that has a prescription attached to it and while it has no info about her dr./hospital you see its from Walgreens and you remember the Walgreens that is still caddy corner from you and this lovely 90 year old woman is grateful and tells you, you must not be from new york and she makes her way to Walgreens as blessings are exchanged.

You make your way for a bit and then tears start flowing. And you realize that this is the life you've been called to live. This is the gift. This is your purpose. To trust your body to guide to you so you can give and receive love. And this young part of you that has been so exhausted for so many years, has this moment of surrender, of understanding that all is well. There is no need to fear, or fight. This is your life. This is your work. This is how easy and magical it can be. And there is no need to prove. Or make others understand. And this young part of you melts and these tears help alchemize the armor and let the emotions move so you can simply be. And this feels like the most incredible miracle. This deep sense of peace of understanding. Of acknowledgment. Of truth.

And you continue to walk and suddenly you are in front of your favorite store. ABC Carpet and Home. Which is simply one of your happy places. A store that curates love, social justice, beauty, community and so much more. and you are taking in the beauty of the windows since the store is closed and then you realize: these windows have been curated by a witch. There are tarot cards, and fairies, and purple potion bottles. And the moon and the sun. And forest animals. Book on alchemy and mysticism, Burma, Eco Sanctuaries. And it hits you. All of these things, these parts of yourself that you have been hiding - so afraid of another round of witch trials, of being stoned in the town square for your innate essence. These pieces are here, on display at ABC Carpet and Home. It is safe. Come home. Claim them. Own them. And this is the magic of my Thanksgiving. Gratitude for my essence. For my love. For the witchiness of my body. For my intuition My turn-on. For being a healer. The very things that women were killed for over the years. The Salem Witch trials. The inquisition. The Courtesans. The Healers. Millions of women killed for being in their essence. In their truth. And this fear has permeated part of your life, unknown for so long. And here is this window, beckoning you with it's beauty and you desire to meet the people who created it to say 'thank you.'

you make your way back to your hotel and head to the beautiful sitting area where a woman you met earlier in the week is there with her cousin. And her sister works at the hotel. And so you gather, and share dishes, and bring out the bottle of pinot noir you bought. And there is turkey, stuffing, cranberries and ham, brussel sprouts and the most off the charts delicious apple cobbler you've ever had. There are conversations of love, of tattoos, of those who've passed. There are tears, laughter, stories shared. There is irreverence, toasts. There are fluffy doughnuts filled with pumpkin cheesecake. The sister knows the woman who created the ABC Carpet and Home display so you get her name to send thanks. And then there is a dance party. A dance party where you get to dance and be wild and move your body amongst beauty, with a harmonica player who played with Stevie Wonder the night before who has the most beautiful soul. And when you get back to your room and see that it is 3am, you are shocked, delighted and grateful for the day was full of all you desired but in ways you could have never created without the guidance of the divine. And it is this dance of surrender, of faith, of coming back to our bodies, our wild hearts, our wise souls that feels like the greatest Thanks of all.