In the past 7 years I’ve transformed my life. Step-by-step. Some forward, some back, some to the west others to the east. Some with bare feet and others with rockin’ heels. Steps toward health, joy, self-love, truth, self expression. Steps in Maine, Italy, Nepal, Cambodia, Montana, Kenya, Hawaii, Montreal, NYC, Seattle. Steps in ghettos, beaches, deserts, mountains, sacred waterfalls. Steps into rivers, oceans, trees, museums, churches, yoga studios, dance halls. Steps onto elephants, canoes, mopeds, trains, buses, planes. Into tents, cabanas, luxury hotels, hammocks, yurts. Steps into pedicure salons, wellness centers, acupuncture offices, physical therapy, energy workers. Steps into an artist studio where I posed nude to own my body as a work of art. Steps to see a therapist, a friend, mother nature. Slow meandering steps, frenetic harried ones, dancing, curvy steps, a few mermaid swims. Some while naked, others with 5 layers on my torso.
Some days maybe 40 steps in total. From my bed to the kitchen and back: grab a tissue a Kind bar, go to the bathroom. And that could have a lasted a few days. Steps taken at sunrise, at 3am, down a cobblestone street, the alleys of Venice. Subway stairs, an escalator. surefooted, weary, wary steps. Steps with tears streaming down my face, with my eyes closed feeling the sunshine, with a smile on my mouth and in my heart.
So many steps.
They were almost always steps towards my true self and even the ones that weren't helped me get there. Another step towards loving, trusting myself, expressing myself, a greater sense of peace and personal power. Steps towards spirit and the divine and away from all that I’d come to know as true, that I'd built my life around. These steps were painful, scary, exhilarating, and relieving. For 35 years I had taken steps to build that life and now I was walking away from it? And to where? And for what? I didn't know at the time, I just knew I had to start walking in a different direction.
What steps can you take towards yourself today? What are you dancing around that needs to shift? I would love to hear about your steps: in any shape, direction and location.
Some of my latest steps in Germany. Healing up my ancestral lineage and my relationship with men.